My Truest Love, on Nearly Every Corner of NYC: An Ode to the Incomparable Dollar Pizza Slice

Oh, dollar pizza. 

I'll never forget the first time we met! I'll admit I was hesitant at first... how can pizza that's $1.00 be any good? There's pizza that's $2.00 just across the street! 

But my friends knew better, they'd lived in New York for longer. And they were much more shit-faced. 

I had that first bite of you and I knew right then and there that this friendship could go the distance.

Remember when I moved into my first apartment? 

I was so broke and scared and hungry, but you—you were there. 

Remember when I broke up with that guy... what was it Brian, Ryan, Kryan? Yeah, Kryan. Kryan and I were at that bar on the LES and we got into that huge fight because he's "not a relationship guy" (.......). 

I got SO tanked and I had to get out of there. 

[anad]

I was planning to drown my sorrows in more shots, but then, I saw you there, alone, glorious and solitary on 1st Avenue. 

You soothed my soul and my stomach that night. I needed those carbs, boo. 

You always know what I need.

You've seen me at my highest highs and my lowest lows, and yet...

You love me, even still. 

And I love you, dollar slice. 

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Even when you're not that great. 

Seriously, sometimes you're just okay. Some places only have veggie, and frankly, I don't want a slice with broccoli on it—get that shit outta here! 

And sometimes you hang out at those weird dingy joints with faded headshots of Jerry Orbach on the wall? I hope I'm not the first one to break this to you, but Jerry Orbach isn't auditioning any more...

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Also, you are too greasy for those skinny ass plates! You need to get you a plate with some substance! 

Seriously, you can do better. We've been over this! I have the grease burns to prove it.

You're gonna do you though, dollar slice. You always do. I think that's what I love about you. There's no one quite like you. You just GET it, you know? Which is why I can't stand to see some mouth-breather cut you into pieces with shitty plastic utensils! 

Sorry, I just get protective. You know this. 

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You've seen me through it all.

Remember New Year's 2014? Cuz I friggin' don't—there's just like 6 pictures of me on Instagram inhaling pizza, so I'm assuming you were there too. Because who else would I want to ring in the new year with? You're the one I go to whenever I'm sad, mad, happy, scared...

And hungry AF.

So, here's to you dollar slice, long may your crust run thin. 

I promise not to eat you with a fork.

[Feature Image Courtesy Fresh NYC] 

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