Winter in New York City has a lot of perks: there are plenty of stunning holiday lights, lots of beautiful, harmonious concerts, and that added bonus of days off, presents, and making out under mistletoe.
Plus, we love getting drunk on eggnog, tripping over the Christmas tree, and dropping the holiday pie. Just kidding, we hate all that.
There are plenty of struggles associated with winter in NYC.
First of all, it gets darker way earlier. Did someone say seasonal depression? In winter, it doesn't feel like we'll ever emerge from the black hole of freezing cold depression.
Then, there's the struggle of ever finding the motivation to exercise, shave, or go out. Read on to commiserate with the struggles of wintertime in NYC.
1. Losing hats and gloves
It usually goes something like this: You're in a store, and you catch a glimpse of a pair of pretty leather gloves. You stroke the gloves. They're so pretty, so soft, that eventually you decide, whatever, I'll splurge. I deserve it.
Fast forward to a month later when you leave your new, pretty, leather gloves in a bar, at your friend's apartment, or you have no idea where you left them but they're not in your bag anymore.
You can apply this scenario to any purchase of a pretty winter hat, scarf, or other winter accessory. What heartbreak is more pronounced than the heartbreak of losing treasured winter accessories?
Okay, plenty of heartbreaks, but it's still a real huge bummer.
2. Finding motivation to go out
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When it's cold out, you crave your bed, right?
So you know the struggle. You're all cuddled up in your warm blankets and you get that text: want to come out tonight?
You wonder why you'd ever go out when the blankets are soft, the Netflix is fresh, and you've got a DiGiorno's pizza in the freezer.
So you say, "I can't go out, I'm busy." Then, you spend the rest of the night anxiously checking Snapchat and wondering if your friends will still want to be your friends after they have a lit night without you.
3. Shaving... like, ever
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Everyone knows that if you want to hook up with someone and you're a girl, you should probably shave your legs, and that if you want to hook up with someone, and you're a guy, you should probably shave your face.
What's the motivation to shave in the winter, though?
First of all, having extra hair means extra insulation, right? Second of all, it's like this: in the summer you're wearing shorts and you're out and about and a lot of people will know if you have hairy legs. In the winter, no one will know (unless, of course, you're hooking up).
This provokes an unending cycle where you don't shave your legs because know one will know. But then you don't really want to hook up with anyone unless you do. #Struggles.
4. Seamless
We're not saying Seamless in itself is a struggle. Seamless is heaven-sent, and we're not sure we'd make it through the month without it.
What we're saying is that, technically, ordering Seamless every single night is more expensive than the grocery store. We're sorry for bringing up that tiny fact-- and we wish we didn't have to face that unpleasant truth, but that's how it is.
However, when there's snow outside-- when it's so cold that your eyelashes freeze on your face, why would you ever want to go to the grocery store?
Also, there's that whole moral dilemma of ordering Seamless during a blizzard since someone has to actually ride their bike through that blizzard to bring you your Pad Thai, but we won't even go there.
5. Holding onto your coat at the bar
rachelelizabethguy Trying to take my blanket into work like... 😂🙈 #BlanketScarf #Discreet #RealTalk #WinterStruggles #LennyKravitz
It's like Sophie's Choice: should you bring your huge puffy winter coat to the bar and then hold onto it all night, or should you go out without your coat and risk frostbite?
At least once during your time as an NYC resident, bringing your coat to the bar will win out, and then you'll decide that you trust humanity and leave your coat hanging on a hook.
Then, you'll come back and your coat is gone. Or, you'll come back too drunk to tell which coat is yours, and you'll grab the wrong coat. Whoops! Your credit card, MetroCard, and license were in your coat pocket! Bummer.
,6. Chapped lips
Why doesn't anyone ever talk about this? Chapped lips have got to be one of the most unpleasant things about winter. Having chapped lips is almost as unpleasant as digging in your bag for that tiny little tube of chapstick.
Then, there's the additional struggle of wondering whether it's gross to ask someone if you can use their chapstick. Or the opposite struggle, wondering if it's gross to let someone use your chapstick.
7. Heaters
Everyone who lives in an NYC apartment knows the deal: either your heater is on, and your apartment is an oven, or your heater is off and your apartment is a freezer.
Since you weren't an item of food that needed to be heated or frozen last time you checked, this can be pretty unpleasant.
There's also the added struggle of heaters in restaurants and businesses. You came into the restaurant totally bundled, and you're sweating before you even get to your table.
Don't even talk to us about sweating on the subway in the winter, either.
8. Snow
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Okay, we know. Snow is gorgeous. It coats the entire city in a sparkling white sheen. The trees are pretty, the rivers are pretty, and sometimes work gets cancelled. Or at least you get to work from home.
This lasts for like one day.
After that one day, the snow gets slushy and black. It gets in the little space between your pants and your shoes.
Plus, what do you do when you straighten your hair and it snows? You can't put your hood up, you'll look weird, but melting snow in your hair ruins your morning's hard work just as resolutely as rain.
9. Tourists
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Sorry, tourists. We love you and everything, but you get on our nerves during the holidays.
Let's say we need to go to Rockefeller Center during the holidays for something as simple as a dentist's appointment, but we can't even get in the door because of the mob outside who are all gaping at a tree.
We know you've never seen a holiday market with this much stuff, or a Christmas tree with that heavy of a star, but we have somewhere to be, and you're in our way.
Check out 7 Must-Do Events to Cross Off Your Brooklyn Holiday Bucket List.
[Feature Image Courtesy MovingInsider.com]