There are plenty of excellent milkshakes in New York City. You've got varieties from Mark to Harlem Shake to the delicious milky treats at Momofuku Milk Bar.
Just saying "milkshake," however, isn't specific enough for us. What about chocolate milkshakes? Well, NYC has plenty of lovely places you can hit and slurp down heavenly chocolate milkshakes, too. There's Shake Shack, Mikey Likes It, and OddFellows.
Here's what we came here to discuss today, however. We're done with creamy milkshakes that are simply delicious. We're done with chocolate milkshakes that just activate the pleasure neurotransmitters in our brains.
What we're trying to say is that we want milkshakes that'll get us drunk.
So where in NYC can you snag a milkshake that'll not only be creamy and delicious, that'll not only be infused with chocolatey goodness, but will also get you tipsy?
Where can we get a milkshake that has a hearty dose of bourbon or whiskey to go along with its other delectable flavors?
Luckily, the options are plentiful. Read on to find out the best spots to slurp boozy milkshakes in NYC.
1. Sidewalk Cafe (94 Avenue A)
natalieherbick You know how I roll. Thanks for the hospitality Nick! #foodcoma #Painesville #SidewalkCafe #oh #tv #newdaycleveland #fox8news #food #breakfast #host #lunch
The Sidewalk Cafe has been delighting customers at the corner of Avenue A and 6th Street for nearly 30 years.
They've got a stage in the back where live bands perform every night, and on Monday evenings they've got an open-mic event. They have bronze musical instruments tacked to the ceiling, mini waterfalls, and friendly bartenders.
Let's get down to it, though. The grasshopper spiked milkshake at Sidewalk Cafe will get you seriously wasted. They're deceptive because they taste just like regular ice cream. We're also very into the salted caramel pretzel and monkey business peanut butter milkshakes, too.
If you're interested in live music, and getting buzzed on delicious spiked milkshakes, Sidewalk Cafe is a great bet.
2. HB Burger (127 West 43rd Street)
heartlandbrew I bring all the boys to the yard. What am I? ... #heartlandbrewery #hardshakes #milkshake #boystotheyard #Monday #timesquare #hbburger #nyc #afterwork #summer #makersmark #haagendazs #jeopardy #popquize
There are several things we love about HB Burger. Let's start off by discussing the crab cake burger; it's everything to us. Also, HB Burger brews their own beer, and they've got house made sodas and quick service.
You may just find that HB Burger will be one of your favorite places you've ever eaten in NYC. Are we stoked to find a place this wonderful just off Times Square? Of course we are. It's like discovering a four leaf clover when you find a restaurant that doesn't suck in midtown.
Their spiked milkshakes cost $9, and they're worth every dollar and calorie if you're looking to get twisted. Yes, they go perfectly with their tasty burgers. Yes, they're even better if you dip your French fries in them.
If you're picking up what we're putting down, run, don't walk, to HB Burger after work today. Then, stumble into Times Square and enjoy the flashing light decadence in your drunken state. That's our advice.
3. DuMont Burger (314 Bedford Avenue)
If you love bourbon, you've absolutely got to try the maple bacon shake. In general, the boozy milkshakes at DuMont Buger hit the spot.
They're just the right amount of strong: they're strong enough to get you tipsy, but not so strong that you won't remember where you are. You'll remember that you're at DuMont Burger, slurping a tasty boozy milkshake.
They've also got drool-inducing burgers and a really great friend chicken sandwich, but we all know the real star of the show are those stellar boozy milkshakes.
Side bar: We've also got to talk about those tempura fried pickles at DuMont Burger. If we could eat them every day without any health repercussions, we absolutely would.
4. Mel's Burger Bar (various locations)
yourcollegetown Hot Dang! We got you covered for dinner! 🍔 @melsburgerbar was awarded as one the top 25 "Best College Town Burger Joints. 👏 it is a must-have if you go to Columbia University in NYC #nyc#eatlocal#local#columbiauniversity #newyorkcity #columbia#ilovenyc#ivyleague #burgers#shakes#melsburgerbar #best#university#yourcollegetown
If you haven't yet been to Mel's Burger Bar, you are seriously missing out on tastebud luxuriance. Yes, we are talking about the mac and cheese burger. It's cooked just right, juicy, and topped with a slightly sweet potato bun.
It mixes in perfectly with the combination of mac and cheese. Also, here's a warning that you may or may not heed. The fries at Mel's Burger Bar are huge. If you're not prepared to be very full, definitely split your portion of French fries with a pal.
They've also got some pretty great milkshakes we've been dreaming about. They have several varieties of milkshake, and they're all huge. They're basically milkshakes within milkshakes.
The PB&J milkshake is rich and tasty, and the after dinner mint milkshake is filled with mint Oreo ice cream and peppermint schnapps. It's absolutely delicious. The boozy milkshakes at Mel's Burger Bar are large, in charge, and enough for two people.
,5. Bill's Bar and Burger (16 West 51st Street)
billsbarandburger Add some booze and say hello to the weekend #sweetlife #billsbarandburger #eeeeeats
The reasons we love Bill's Bar and Burger include, but are not limited to, their disco fries, their huge selection of beer, their chili burger, and those oh-so-amazing boozy milkshakes.
This place is awesome.
Here's the lowdown on the milkshakes: You can order each milkshake virgin, but you also have the option to add alcohol to your milkshake for $4. We swoon about the campfire milkshake, if you must know. It's got burnt marshmallow and Maker's Mark bourbon.
They've also got strawberry, peanut butter chocolate, and other delicious flavors. Your milkshake from Bill's Bar and Burger may just wind up being the best milkshake you've ever had.
6. Mark (33 Saint Mark's Place)
goldsmre Slider, cheese fries, and Guinness shake! #marknyc #sliders #nyfoodtour #eastvillage #preconcertfeast #yum #eatingwaytoomuchthistrip
At Mark, there's a lot of good stuff going on. They've got a delicious pecan pie with a very thick graham cracker crust. They have some of the best sliders you've ever had, and bacon burgers that are pretty on point too.
Yeah, they've also got a Guinness shake, and it's really something special. It's got an entirely distinct taste and it will get you entirely buzzed.
Plus, it's creamy and delicious. You really can't go wrong with the famous Guinness shake at Mark.
If you don't want to get drunk (we don't understand...) and you love bacon, try the candied bacon shake. It's got bacon bits in every sip.
7. 67 Burger (various locations)
msbrittnihicks Yasss! 🙌🏻 #cheatday #brunch #67burger #milkshake #curlyfries #burger #momsintown #brooklyn #delicious #food #yes
We've got to say a couple things about 67 Burger before we get to the main event (the milkshakes, of course).
Their curly fries are perfect. They're not too crunchy nor are they too soggy. They're salty and nice and spicy. Also, 67 Burger's got delicious turkey burgers and amazing salads. In a word, it's a pretty excellent restaurant.
Now, here we go. Let us discuss the milkshake situation for you for a second. They have delicious, seasonal milkshakes. Yes, we are talking pumpkin milkshakes. Will they get you drunk, though? No, they won't. However, their beer milkshakes will get you drunk.
You heard correctly. They've got beer milkshakes, and they're amazing. Really, it's worth coming here just for those scrumptious beer milkshakes (of course, you should have a burger and sweet potato fries while you're here because boozy milkshakes sound like an unbalanced meal).
Check out 7 Amazing Craft Brews You Need to Drink in NYC Right Now.
[Feature Image Courtesy Instagram]