Sometimes you have to let yourself go a little wild.
On the triangle of priorities, adventurous New Yorkers always choose fun and success over sleep. Always.
So, tried-and-true New Yorkers never sleep, and we have strange conversations, and we’re always broke.
But where we’re bereft of cash we’re wealthy in experience, fun, and friends.
We meet a lot of people, and sometimes, when we wake up in the morning, we cannot believe the decisions we made.
We never have any regrets, though, ever. Official New Yorkers take YOLO to the extreme. Read on to find out just how we do that thing we do.
1. You meet weird people
Every Monday you get texts from people you’ve never heard of.
Your best guess is that you blacked out and gave out your phone number like it was candy. You get calls from drag queens, old guys, young guys, and weird guys. You even get calls from some girls.
So many people have opened up to you – it’s hard to keep track of whose story is whose.
[anad]
All you know is that people can be effing weird.
You’ve learned to shut up carefully, you’ve mastered the art of shutting up, so you get to hear crazy stuff. Some people never do shut up, though.
2. You fall asleep in weird places
Sleep? What’s that?
You don’t have sleep while you’re busy running around, socializing, and killing it professionally. You’re way too adventurous to do something so cliché as to sleep in your own bed.
So where, you might be wondering, should you sleep?
The subway is almost as obvious and cliché as a bed. So you fall asleep in odd ass places, like a park bench (yes, you’ve been mistaken for homeless), like your ex’s bed (whoops!), like the booth at a bar (super mean of that bouncer to throw you out).
Let’s face it. When you care more about adventure than anything, sleep is not a priority. And should never be.
3. You spend too much money
Whenever someone invites you to do something, your immediate response is a resounding yes. You’re an adventurous New Yorker after all.
Your friend wants you to come to a concert? Well, then, sure.
It costs $10 to get in? Alright, and you’ll definitely be drinking while you’re there. So that’s another $50 down the drain.
You also tend to overschedule yourself, which means rushing. Which means you typically do not have time to wait for the subway, and half your bank account gets drained on cabs. But, it’s worth it because at the end of the night, you know you had a blast. Ballin.
4. You meet a lot of random people
And you constantly run into them.
Your friends are used to you disappearing on a night out for a stretch of several hours, and playfully roll their eyes when you know people wherever you go.
[anad2]
At first you’re thrown off when you see the guy you drunkenly climbed a barbed wire fence with outside the club... at a business meeting (of all places) but after he winks at you, you know you’re good.
Classic adventurous New Yorker bonding.
5. You almost die a lot
Too often you wake up on a Sunday morning relieved that you survived.
Did you really need to leap down a giant flight of stairs?
Did you really need to try and climb a barbed wire fence? Great job, now your hands will be scabbed for weeks.
Did you really need to rent a Citibike while you were blacked out and ride across the river to Randall’s Island? Why did you think that was a good idea?
Thank god the woman at the tattoo parlor refused to pierce your tongue because you were too drunk.
,6. You hang out with celebrities
... and experience the crazy sensation of this epiphany; they’re people too.
They too have awkward moments.
They too have to go to the bathroom and have to make conversation and have to get drunk to alleviate social tension.
[anad]
The difference though, is that they get into all the clubs without lines. And because you, the adventurous New Yorker that you are, have somehow been welcomed into their posse, you, too get to skip all the lines.
Since said celebrity has cash to blow, that celebrity pays for all of your drinks all night, and when you try to return the favor, that celebrity is upset when you buy bottom shelf whiskey.
He seemed to forget that not everyone is famous. And rich.
7. You make out with too many people
The fact that you don’t yet have something like mono is pretty astonishing. Oh, what’s that? You do have mono, and you have it right now? Well, this is awkward.
But, whatever. That won’t stop you, can’t get you down. Even though it maybe should.
8. You have an amazing time
Your fun meter is off the charts, mostly because you always say yes.
When people ask you to go out on a weeknight, you say yes.
[anad2]
When people ask you to take a weekend day trip or go to a music festival, concert or play, you say yes.
When you say yes to things, you usually wind up in phenomenally fun situations. Your life should be a movie, it’s so effing awesome.
9. You can’t believe this is your life
When you stop to actually consider what’s happened in your life, it’s hard to believe it was really you.
Did you really get it on with that hot girl in the bathroom stall at the bar?
Did you really spend a whole night dancing on tables, and never get yelled at by any bouncers?
Check out 9 Official Ways to Tell If You're a True New Yorker.
[via USA Today]