Although there are millions of people in NYC, somehow it's harder to find a relationship here.
New Yorkers have to take drastic measures in order to actually meet people and Tinder is definitely up there on the drastic scale.
Unfortunately, the app often falls into the wrong hands and you end up wasting hours of your time swiping left past some of the weirdest profiles in the world.
Even my guy friends do some things on Tinder that I know wouldn't work well with the ladies, and these guys aren't even that bad.
That's why we've created this: the ultimate list of 17 mistakes you should never, ever make on Tinder. Take notes, fellas.
1. Post a picture of only your abs
Good for you that you work out and have abs, but it looks super conceited/ desperate when you do that.
I know Tinder is based off of looks, and you want to put your best foot forward.
But if you don't show me your face, I will have to assume that you're a butter face and probably have a shitty personality.
Some guys take it a step further and only show a close up of a their junk. Luckily that happens less. Stop trying so hard.
2. Post pictures of yourself at the gym
See above. Taking a picture of yourself working out is one of the most narcissistic things that one can do.
And PLEASE don’t take it to the next level and flex. Flexing is trying way too hard.
3. Post a picture of something that's not of you at all
This is sketchy and weird. We will think: This guy must be ugly or he must be hiding something.
How else are you not in a single picture? Gotta get out more, buddy!
4. Post a picture of you and your girlfriend insinuating you'd like to have a threesome
The first time that I swiped left past this; I assumed that must have been the one guy in the world who thought that was ok. But, I have surprisingly seen this several times.
No, I don’t want to be the third wheel in bed, just so you and your girlfriend can spice up your sex life.
There are other ways to do that, which don’t involve me.
5. Post a picture of you looking off into the distance
Who is taking that picture and what are you looking at?
Did you have a friend snap a photo of just you so that you could have a smoldering picture for Tinder? Your poor friend.
If anyone is asked to do this for their friend, always say no. It's for the good of society.
6. Post a picture of you and your dog:
Not gonna lie; this one actually works. But, it's a cheap shot.
It definitely gets me to swipe right, but it's like taking steroids in sports- giving yourself an unfair advantage.
Using your adorable dog to lure me in, only for you to say something sleazy to me? Ugh.
7. Post bathroom pics
This makes you look super conceited and shows that you have nothing better to do.
The bathroom is for your #1's and #2's. Your #3 Is NOT taking pictures in the mirror.
I hope your phone falls into the toilet. Actually, I take that back. I have been there, and I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy.
8. Post a picture with a kid
We know that you're trying to tell us: “Look how great I am! I'm good with kids!”
But we are not going to take the chance that it’s probably your kid. I’m not on Tinder to find kids to chill with. I can barely take care of myself, I don’t need to bring a kid into that mess.
9. Only post huge group pics
It’s definitely a good thing that you have friends, but which one are you? I’m not risking it.
If you don’t have the confidence to show a picture where I can clearly tell which one is you, I also don’t have confidence in you.
Tinder is not a place to take a leap of faith.
,10. Mention that you like "petite" or "skinny" girls
Seriously, dude? And I only like guys who look exactly like Channing Tatum, but beggars can’t be choosers.
Hard left swipe on that one.
11. Only post pictures of you with a big group of girls
Are you trying to look like a player? I don't understand why that would be attractive to me…
“Yay! I get to fight over you with several hot girls! Just what I was looking for!” No thank you.
12. Post a picture of yourself trying to make a sexy face
Just freakin’ smile. I want to see that you like having a good time.
Not that you could be a model if you really put your all into it. If it looks like you try harder than I do to look good, I’m swiping left for sure.
13. Post selfies in bed
Are you trying to give us a sneak peak of what we would have to wake up to?
Selfies in any shape or form are almost always a bad idea, unless the focal point of the picture is the beautiful scenery of the grand canyon. That, I can let slide. But, a selfie in your bed is just annoying.
14. Post a picture of your bank statement
Really? Compensating for something?
This is gross.
15. Post a picture of you and your car
Newsflash: Girls don’t care about cars.
All I see is you next to a blue car, while thinking you’re hot stuff. I have no idea if it’s a Ferrari, or if people are even into Ferrari’s these days. Basically, IDGAF.
16. Change your profile to: “In NYC for the night, looking for a good time”
You mean, I can be your one night stand while you’re visiting here? Ha. No thanks.
I wonder if this ever actually works. I guess, more power to ya if it does.
17. Send a gross first message
This is really annoying. I’m pretty sure you would not have the balls to say these things to my face. Not that I would EVER want anyone to say some of those things to me.
EVER.
You can bet you’ll get deleted from my matches as soon as you graphically explain what you’d like to do to me. You’re disgusting. But, then again, who’s expecting chivalry on Tinder?
Check out 10 Ugly Truths You Need to Know About the Dating Scene in NYC.