Hitting up a bar the day you get dumped (or the day you do the dumping) is just way too cliché.
You’ll probably end up emptying your wallet and draining your bank account-- as your stomach fills up on whiskey.
You’ll also probably end up hooking up with someone awful and regretting it the next day, and the everlasting paradox of alcohol will plague you harder than ever before.
You went to the bar to get drunk and feel better, but when you wake up the next day hungover and depressed, you’ll be way worse off than when you started. Not to mention poorer.
Going out and getting totally obliterated after a break-up can be fun, and if that’s the route you want to take, then take it.
But that's not your only option. Here are 6 brilliant ways to survive a break-up in New York City without going to your local bar.
1. Get back to doing what you love
That pesky relationship was holding you back.
You were probably spending your weeknights eating pizza and watching Netflix, rather than doing what you really wanted to do.
It probably wasn’t even the show you really wanted to watch on Netflix. It was probably some really shoddy compromise.
You were probably wrapped up in some really passive aggressive, pointless fights. Now, all that is over. Now, you can do what you want.
[anad]
It’s important to identify and follow your passion, because it’s important to do what you love doing.
That's the first step in self-love; ultimately, you'll put yourself in a position to be surrounded by other people who do what you love.
Do you like biking? Join a biking group, and head off on a thirty-mile ride around the city.
If you like pottery, sign yourself up for that pottery class. Go to a poetry reading, or a yoga class. Whatever you’ve been yearning to do, do it.
2. Hook up with someone else
Sure, you might think this step could be accomplished by going to the bar, and in all honesty, it probably could. But if you did that, it’d be with some lame stranger, and, ultimately, it'd probably make you feel pretty bad about yourself.
What I mean by “hook up with someone else,” is reach out to an old crush, an old buddy, or the new friend you made in your biking group. Whoever said the best way to get over one guy is to get with another was telling the truth.
So when you Facebook inbox the guy you always wanted to make-out with in high school, and he agrees to come visit you for the weekend, you’ll probably forget you even had a break up. Boyfriend who?
3. Start to exercise
Endorphins are nature’s happy drug.
You know how you feel when you finish all your work, do your laundry, clean the kitchen, change your sheets, and pay all your bills? Well, that feeling requires a whole ton of effort. And when you exercise, you can get that feeling every day with so much less maintenance.
Plus it’s springtime now. And we live in a completely beautiful city.
[anad2]
So strap on your running shoes and head for a jog down the East River promenade. Or, head to Central Park and take an outdoor exercise class. Splurge on that SoulCycle class you’ve been wanting to take. Head to the nearest park and join in on a basketball pick-up game.
Whatever your exercise of choice is, make it fun, not torture. Exercise does not have to be torture. And once those endorphins are rushing through your brain, you’ll instantly feel like a superstar again.
,4. Reunite with friends
If you’re like me, and you grew up somewhere on the East Coast, you probably have a lot of long lost friends that live in NYC who you never get to see. Which is a real shame.
I have a whole bunch of friends I’ve only seen two or three times the entire two years I’ve lived in NYC, but every time we reunite, it’s like I’m joining up with my former self. It helps me remember the past isn’t lost, and it always makes me really happy. So do it.
[anad]
Plan a brunch for your high school friends, your camp friends, your college friends, whoever it is that lives here that you never get the time to see. And if you have no long lost friends, then get together with the friends you always see.
Plan something awesome to do. Maybe you could hike in Central Park. Maybe you could find an indoor trampoline and hop around.
The odds are that you disconnected with some of the people who really care about you while you were in that lame relationship, and this is your shot to let your friends show you their love.
5. Start baking
If you’re not going to binge drink, you might as well binge eat.
Invite a friend over. Make some delicious brownies, maybe even some "special" brownies or just regular ones. Bake a cake or a pie. Spend your afternoon shoving food into the void your ex left.
Just kidding. Sort of.
If sweet isn’t your thing, and you prefer savory, then make that one dish you’ve been meaning to try.
6. And just be optimistic
Recently, some guy at a bar said to me that when it comes to romance, you actually just don’t need to worry because if it works, it works.
[anad]
If you and your ex broke up, it just means you’re not right for each other. Someday soon, you’ll meet someone new and you’ll understand why it never worked out with anyone else.
What you need to focus on is devoting your energy to your needs, emotions, and passions. Be nice to yourself. Do what you love, and you’ll be back on your feet in no time...
Maybe even in a bar.
Check out 5 Moments You Realize Why Dating is So Absolutely Absurd in NYC.