What do all boroughs in New York City have in common? You mean besides the fact that 8.3 million people from everywhere in the world live in them, and that we all call NYC home?
Well, all five boroughs share a stunning skyline, one that's recognized worldwide.
They're also all stitched together by a single NYC identity, while remaining true to our own flavors and personalities. Maintaining our own individual flairs, attracting 50 million visitors worldwide, each borough has something special to share. They all also have something else in common, which is that they bear striking resemblances to social media networks.
So the question is... which social media outlet is most like the borough you're from?
Manhattan = Facebook
This is an existentially wrought comparison, but the question seems pretty obvious: if you're not on Facebook, do you really exist? Similarly, if you're not in Manhattan, do you really exist?
The comparison doesn't end here, however. While the entire world has their eyes glued to their Facebook feed, the world also has their eyes glued to Manhattan.
Glamorous, understated, manicured, famous world-wide... tall skyscrapers... oh wait. That's just Manhattan, not Facebook.
But since Facebook is the most visited website in the world, and the most visited city in the world is... well, Bankok is the most visited city in the world, not Manhattan. But Manhattan is the fifth most visited city in the world, so this comparison still makes sense. Oh, they're also both rich.
Brooklyn = Tumblr
Why, do you ask, did I make this comparison? The reason is simple.
Brooklyn draws to mind some of the same qualities that Tumblr does-- a whole subset dedicated to the acknowledgment of the soul. Of course, this is not universally true.
There are certain areas of Brooklyn with a marked lack of cognizance about the existence of the soul, and Tumblr has a lot of porn, so. Point made.
But by and large, when I think of Brooklyn I think of the Brooklyn Bridge, of Park Slope and Community Bookstore and the Brooklyn Book Festival, of the Brooklyn Botanical Gardens and the white marble courthouse where my sister interned this past summer.
And when I think of Tumblr I think of pictures of two people in love, entwined in blankets in the back of a pick up truck overlooking a mountain, and I think the two people in that picture probably live in Brooklyn.
So that's that.
Staten Island = Snapchat
It's easy to pick on Staten Island, and it's mean, and not necessary.
I am very familiar with the “Staten Island Prototype,” and I can call that person to mind quite effortlessly. The problem with this stereotype for me, however, is that I've never actually met this person. I worked with a girl last spring who was from Staten Island, and I liked her a lot. I thought her boyfriend kind of sucked, though, which I guess is partially why I paired Staten Island up with Snapchat.
They're both a little seedy, a little questionable, and with sultry undertones. I don't really know what I'm saying, but the point is that Snapchats disappear within a matter of seconds, and as does Staten Island-- from the mind of the cultural collective.
Queens = Twitter
Queens and Twitter are both tough, slightly underrated, and resilient.
They both matter way more than people give them credit for mattering. If it weren't for Queens, we wouldn't have JFK Airport and New Yorkers wouldn't ever be able to get anywhere. If it weren't for Twitter, we wouldn't be able to effortlessly communicate with all our favorite celebrities (I met, Hannibal Buress because he tweeted back at me after his show-- come on!).
Also, Queens is home to many multilingual residents, and Twitter is all about language-- and is certainly not afraid to tell you to be more creative if your tweet is too long.
The Bronx = Instagram
What the Bronx and Instagram have in common is a bursting degree of pride.
Everyone that grew up in and is from the Bronx boasts that information on their sleeve. And, of course, the entire premise of Instagram is pride: you put up pictures from your life because you want to flaunt it.
Thick-skinned, tough, we-can-sleep-through-anything, hip-hop loving Bronxites are known for being tough, and Instagram is known for being pretty. But in 2013, Instagram grew by 23%-- so I guess that means it's pretty tough too.
Oh, also, Yankee Stadium is in the Bronx, and I know that a lot of people put up Instagram photos of themselves at Yankee games.
If you enjoyed this article, check out Why Growing Up in the Bronx Is the Best Thing That Could Ever Happened!