The best part of the Internet and social media is that anyone can join and say what they want. But the worst part? Anyone can join and say what they want.
And the best part of living New York City is the millions and millions of people you can meet. But the worst part? The millions and millions of people you can follow online.
If you've been meaning to do a little winter cleaning on your social media feeds, go through this list below and hopefully your updates will get a little less annoying.
1. Fitness Instagrams
Fitness blogs are great and all, but isn't the point to post recipes and workout tutorials? Well, you can't do that on Instagram so you just end up posting pictures of your body and showing off. Peace out!
2. Your ex hook-up
Oh, look at that. You took a picture with your new hook-up. You didn't even like to acknowledge my existence outside of the bedroom. Also, you're not so cute anymore in the daylight. No more.
3. The obsessive activist
Yes, the world sucks and needs changing. But, come on! Can you just enjoy your Au Bon Pain without ranting about the patriarchy! Have you ever heard the phrase “Choose your battles”? Off you go.
4. The Wall Street a**hole
*Rolls eyes* Congratulations. You make a lot of money. You always get bottle service at Avenue; you take an Uber to the subway, and you love selfies with bottle waitresses. Never seen that before.
5. The #OnlyInNewYork tag
“Just got Starbucks and now I'm sitting in Central Park! #OnlyInNew York” Um... I think you can get coffee and sit in a park anywhere. The enthusiasm is great, though, I suppose. L8er!
6. Your ex partner
Oh, look at that! My ex is totally happy and doing better? Aww, that's nice. I'm stressed, broke, and overworked. Aww, my ex has a new partner? I'm alone...un-followed!
7. The secret hater
The secret hater and the regular hater are much different. In person, they'll say they love your new puppy or something, but online they'll post, “God, I hate dogs.” Really? Hmm. Goodbye.
,8. Food Instagram
Food pictures have been around just as long as selfies, and they're just as annoying as ever. A new salad picture from Chop't? Oh, wow. Looks so different than the last pile of lettuce you Instagrammed. Unfriended.
9. The ignorant/bigot
It's always sad still finding racists, homophobes, misogynists, xenophobes, whatever in 2015.
Especially in a city like New York. No one who's trying to better themselves deserves that negativity on their newsfeed. Bye, Felicia!
10. The health amateur
This person is like the bastard child of the food and fitness Instagrams. This person wants to be healthy, but no. All they do is drink sugar-filled Liquiteria juices and take pictures of them. Nope. Sorry, dear.
11. The horrible promoter/promoter's friend
I can't beleive u come to the club on flats and u like 4ft tall smh #dumbgirl #NYCPromoterPrblms— NYCPromoterLife (@NYCPromoterguy) February 20, 2013
No, Mr. Girl-Obsessed Promoter from Seaside, we do not want to go, “GET TRASHED - THE PARTY PART 8: THE ANIMAL EDITION!!” in Bed-Stuy. Maybe next time. Hopefully not. I'm out.
12. The rich kid on their parent's dollar
If you find yourself saying, “Daddyyyyyy, I spent all my allowance already” on a weekly basis, you might be this kind of person. Being unemployed and obsessed with #blessed would also add to it. Peace out, girl scout.
13. The party boy/girl
Spent 4 hours dancing like a champ in these bad boys, but fucking fell walking to the car. @PartyGirlPrblms #stillhott pic.twitter.com/JOKhqOOY — Captain Torrence (@CaptanTorrence) April 6, 2012
Another Tuesday, another selfie at 1 Oak. Or at Lavo. Or with the promoter. Or all of the above. Bonus points if they SnapChat a picture of a flaming Grey Goose bottle. Delete!
14. The obsessive NY sports fan
Just Lollllll #tag that one friend that likes the #Knicks... http://t.co/ElqwK4g6zQ— Knicks_Movement (@1NyKnicks) February 23, 2015
Let's be real. Your team will probably lose. Mets, Yankees, Jets, Rangers, Knicks it's all the same. None of them are not doing so hot recently, and you've been saying, “We'll get 'em next year” for a while now. Auf wiedersehen.
15. The passive aggressive relative
I miss you too, Grandma LuAnn, but I don't think I'll be moving back home soon... Yes, I know the rent is much cheaper there... Okay, so you see that block button on my page? If you wouldn't mind clicking it, that'd be great.