Everyone knows New York City has some of the best cuisines and dining experiences in the world. And where there are restaurants, there are servers. Despite being an incredibly demeaning job, serving will always be a good go-to job for daily income and flexible schedules.
However, the demeaning part comes from the way many customers treat servers as if they are lesser beings.
If you find yourself having some bad dining experiences, maybe it's time to rethink your attitude.
Next time you decide to yell at your server, keep these 7 hard truths in mind.
1. Bad service is most likely your fault, not your server's
This is the absolute number one thing all restaurant customers need to learn.
When it comes to your servers, what goes around will most definitely come back around. Being nice actually makes them want to serve you. Servers really do want to help you enjoy yourself because it helps them enjoy their terrible job just a little bit more.
However, coming in with a terrible attitude, expecting to be treated like royalty, and putting down your server's character for not getting your refill immediately will lead to more bad service. Your attitude makes all the difference, and passive aggression will only get you kicked out by the manager.
[anad]
2. They are servers, not slaves
Yes, you are paying your hard earned money for a service, but you are not paying for a servant. Even though the majority of New York restaurants are small, servers still have several other people to attend to. Especially during dinner.
Back in the day, a customer once wrote me a note, detailing why he gave me a 6% tip. One of the points was my failure to constantly keep his cup full of soda. During the 7:30pm dinner rush.
While a server's job is to get you what you want, their job is to also get their other customers what they need and not to stand right by your side, waiting for your next command. Additionally, as stated before, you do not get to decide the quality of their character because they forgot to put your salad dressing on the side.
3. Actually, it's not okay you came in right before closing
This might seem like a small issue, but it's actually pretty annoying. Yes, we all get those late-night cravings, but when you see restaurant staff stacking chairs and cleaning tables, it's pretty safe to say that it's time to close. Trust me, they're not doing closing duties just for fun.
On top of simply coming in, don't be rude and take 2 hours to eat your meal. The restaurant emptied out for a reason and it doesn't mean you can sit back and spend the rest of your night there. The staff was polite enough to serve you so close to closing time, now return the favor and make it speedy.
4. Some mistakes aren't THAT big of a deal
There are two types of people in the world: people who understand that humans make mistakes and people who expect absolute perfection. It's one thing to receive a totally incorrect dish or something you're allergic to, but it's nowhere near the same thing as forgetting to add crutons to your salad or getting tap water instead of sparkling.
You're going to make your life and everyone else's lives much easier by simply relaxing.
You will have your meal eventually, but if you want perfect service, you're free to go to a fine dining establishment where servers are paid salary. Additionally, it's quite easy to see through your attempts at getting a free meal by exaggerating our mistakes. Nice try, now here's the check.
,5. Your kids aren't too special to sit down and be quiet
Kids these days have it so easy and they're going to turn into such bratty adults. If I ran around restaurants, screaming, breaking things, and crying as if it weren't my fault, my parents would have landed one on my back side. Because kids need to learn manners and the consequences of their actions. So if you're not going to parent, don't become one.
My former boss had stay at work for 2 extra hours one time, because a customer handed her a $100 bill to watch her kids and let them run around the event space. Unless you are at Chuck E. Cheese, no other restaurants should be treated like you're there. Childhood expression is great and all, but restaurants aren't the place for it.
6. Servers SURVIVE on tips
This hardly needs explanation. We make very little by the hour, so your tips are everything. Part of going out to eat in the United States is tipping. That's a fact. So make sure to take the tip into account when deciding if you can afford a certain restaurant!
Also, whether your server brought you your kale salad on time does not determine if they deserve to pay their rent this month. Every human deserves to pay for their necessities, no matter their ability to serve. Also, there are tons of people working salary who do their job terribly and don't have to worry about their next paycheck. So don't pull that whole “everyone gets what they work for” argument!
7. They have no influence on food quality
At the end of the day, servers are delivery personnel. They don't go into the kitchen and oversee the curation of the food. If something is cooked incorrectly, simply let them know and they will do what they can to fix it. But also understand that this is the risk you took by buying a service performed by imperfect humans.
Food quality is not the server's concern, it's service. Getting mad over things almost no one can control is completely pointless. Additionally, keep in mind the differences in opinion. You might have a different idea of medium-rare than the trained cooks. Again, that's the risk you take.
If you enjoyed this article, check out 22 Moments Your NYC Doorman Puts Up With More Sh*t Than You Realize!