While we're all itching to check out the new Alamo Drafthouse, Hollywood isn't really giving us much to work with this Halloween.
Are we supposed to be impressed by the one measly offering of Ouija: Origin of Evil? Unless you were also terrified by the travesty of an adaptation, The Girl on the Train– we wouldn't blame you.
Lucky for us, Netflix is at the ready with an insane variety of terrifying, gruesome, and unsettling flicks to satisfy all your Halloween needs.
What a time to be alive. There are literally hundreds of thriller and horror movies up there alone but hopefully, this list will help cut you and your boo's decision time to 1 hour instead of 2.
And the best thing about curling up with bae and watching a scary flick at home is that you can always just switch back to Gilmore Girls (gotta get through that re-watch before A Year in the Life, amirite?) and no one's around to judge you.
Hush (2016)
Chances are, you've already seen this one or you have at least one friend who keeps telling you to watch it. Listen to them!
This might seem like your run of the mill home invasion/cat-and-mouse movie but with one important departure– the protagonist is deaf woman who's resourceful skills are seriously tested. Also, she totally delivers.
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The result is an intensely suspenseful thriller filled with dramatic irony (actual irony, not Sarah Silverman irony) and some amazing sound design.
A Girl Walks Home Alone At Night (2014)
It's in black and white and it's subtitled– okay, now that the disclaimer's out of the way:
Described as "a sly, slinky vampire romance set in an imaginary Iranian underworld," by Variety's Guy Lodge, this could quite possibly be the most unique film you see this year. Seriously, we'll fight with you in the Facebook comments. Kidding. Kind of (editor's note: No, I totally f*cking will... after I watch the movie).
But really, find if you've happened to stumble upon another artsy, feminist, Iranian Vampire Western, then we'll talk.
I Am The Pretty Thing That Lives in The House (2016)
This one's a Netflix original that just came out TODAY– a foray into a genre they haven't explored much, but we have a feeling they'll be just as good as this as they have been with adapting Marvel comic books.
Fun fact: the film was written and directed by Oz Perkins, Anthony Perkins' son. Anthony Perkins, as in Norman Bates. Talk about legacy.
We're expecting some Shirley Jackson vibes (she's actually the inspiration behind one of the characters) sprinkled with a healthy amount of Edgar Allen Poe's "The Fall of The House of Usher." Basically, we're praying for the haunted house ghost story that Crimson Peak totally failed to be.
Sleepy Hollow (1999)
We had to make room for this classic. Pretty much the only time it makes sense to see this movie is this weekend, and it is a fantastic watch. Sure, it's a little cheesy and you pretty much always know what's gonna happen but damn, dat cinematography.
When a film uses the bleach-bypass process, as Sleepy Hollow does, the result is almost monochromatic. However, the usually brighter colors like blood red and yellow hair also render unexpectedly, giving the film a completely unique, ethereal tone.
tl;dr– IT'S REALLY F*CKING PRETTY, OKAY?
Also, can you really turn down Tim Burton and Johnny Depp while they were still cool, trendy weird and not Hot Topic weird?
The Babadook (2014)
Were you on the It Follows train? Basically, if you're looking for some more arthouse horror, this should give you your fix.
Playing on the many children' tales that always seemed kind of weird, The Babadook uses dark animation and tightly focused shots to explore a mother and son's relationship with grief. But in a freaky, you'll-want-to-check-the-closet-afterwards kinda way.
We Are Still Here (2015)
A typical "couple moves to a new town to start over" scenario (this time, it's to escape memories of their dead son), this is almost an homage to Grindhouse films that just straight up aren't made anymore.
The performances of the actors playing the grieving parents play a huge part, by making their almost stock roles people you're going to care about for an hour and a half.
Like many of the films on this list, they light a long fuse and follow it slowly into an explosive payoff you'll actually appreciate– unlike a few of the films on this list (can't all be winners).
The Invitation (2015)
Unpopular opinion: Jennifer's Body (2009) was not that bad. Like, it was actually pretty smart, in an artsy way, if you thought about it (read: YOU JUST DIDN'T GET IT).
Note that this movie, Karyn Kusama's first feature length film after Jennifer's Body, does achieve a bit more than its predecessor. Her skills shine not with depicting the supernatural, but with framing real, relatable life within the weird.
It also centers around old friends, this time reunited at a dinner party. The plot, while deceptively simple, lays down its cards in a similarly slow manner before they're abruptly thrown in your face– and all of a sudden there's blood everywhere.
Also, say hey to Daario from Game Of Thrones– Michiel Huisman seems to always be playing obnoxious new boyfriends.
Honeymoon (2014)
If you've ever felt like you're being catfished on Tinder, or you've simply felt misled by a romantic partner, you'll appreciate the ride Honeymoon takes you on. Even the most experienced horror buffs will be caught off guard at least once.
Following a couple on their honeymoon (the girl is Rose Leslie, Ygritte from Game of Thrones, and we're too lazy to look up the guy, sorry), things slooowly start to get weirder and weirder as not-Jon Snow starts to figure out Ygritte might not be what she seems.
Heads up, you're not allowed to use this movie as an excuse for going through your bae's DMs– dat's still not coo.
The Awakening (2011)
Starring Rebecca Hall (Vicky Cristina Barcelona), this film is worth it for the 1920s aesthetics alone. It's really more of a mystery than a horror at heart but it's definitely a ghost story. You could probably classify it as a "psychological" film if you're like that.
It takes place at a haunted boarding school, which serves as a rich enough setting to make up for the predictable parts. Full disclosure, it has one of those "???" endings, but it's almost so ambiguous in its entirety that it fits.
Dead Snow (2009)
Nazi. Zombies. That's pretty much all you need to know.
Sure, this one's definitely not the most cerebral film on this list. It's certainly unsurprising that on Rotten Tomatoes (where it's rated a surprisingly high 66% fresh), one of the commonly listed weaknesses is "the plot."
But its visuals were received well by critics and if The Walking Dead's been bringing ya down (who hasn't The Walking Dead been bringing down lately?), this is the campy zombie splatter film you deserve.
And if you're really feelin' it, you can even queue up a double feature with the sequel, Dead Snow: Red vs. Dead.
We Are What We Are (2013)
We can admit that Americans can really drop the ball when it comes to adapting foreign horror films, but this re-make of the 2010 Mexican festival bait (originally Somos lo que hay) is no Rings (editor's note: or Let the Right One In, TBH).
Fair warning, this one is definitely pretty grisly, so without giving anything away, maybe don't queue this one up during dinner. The gore isn't necessarily gratuitous― the action of the film builds surprisingly slow―but it should be enough to turn your stomach.
Creep (2014)
Uugghhhh, we guess we had to put ONE found footage film on this list. We're so sorry. Also, if you don't think you can take Mark Duplass seriously in a serious role, skip it.
Creep, however, separates itself from its Blair Witch-y contemporaries as a modern take on the genre, one that acknowledges how modern technology has actually evolved (looking at you, V/H/S).
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The events hinge on a man answering an ad on Craigslist to head to a remote mountain town and– we had you at Craigslist, didn't we? That set-up is enough to make most New Yorkers go, "NAH son," so we'll leave you with that.
The Uninvited (2009)
Ready to get your teen angst on? After leaving a mental facility after her mother dies, a teenager returns home to find that her father is now with the woman who used to be her mother's live-in nurse (Elizabeth Banks in a serious role, look at that).
A moody and interesting take on the tale of the wicked stepmother does give way to some maybe predictable plot twists, but it's almost more interesting watching the characters catch up to what you've already figured out. It certainly makes it more of a nail-biter.
Note: This is a remake of the 2003 Korean horror-drama A Tale of Two Sisters, which is unsurprisingly so much better, but not on Netflix.
[Feature Image Courtesy Flipboard]