I believe in love. True love? Maybe not. But definitely love, in some way, shape, or form.
Even if there’s no such thing as “the one” I believe there is such a thing as “a one” who works just as well.
I also believe in dating. Which, in New York, is like a game that no one taught you all of the rules to but you’re expected to win anyway.
Eventually you will find the person you want to settle down and move to the suburbs (or Brooklyn) with. But until then, do your thing!
Even if you’re not in it for the long haul, there are reasons to stay in it. Good reasons. Like these ones...
1. They order your Lyft to their apartment
Look, we love the subway. But we don’t necessarily love it at 2 a.m. So if you’ve found yourself someone who follows up “Wanna come over?” with “I’ll order you a car” you keep that person.
2. Their apartment has air conditioning / a roof / a dishwasher
These things are rare, and these things are valuable. Hold onto them.
3. You live off of the same subway stop
Convenience is key. If your walk of shame is less than 10 blocks, you’ve got it made.
4. They live right by a great bagel shop
Morning sustenance is vital! Breakfast is the most important meal of the day! You deserve that bagel and schmear from your favorite place—whether it’s H&H, Ess-A-Bagel, my personal favorite Tompkins Square Bagels, Murray’s, Leo’s—and all the better if it’s easy to get to.
5. They’re not a DJ but they have a friend who is
No one wants a club rat. But everyone wants someone who is friends with a club rat. No cover for the DJ’s 60 closest friends!
6. They live on their own
No roommates? SCORE. Cook naked. Watch TV naked. Finding a boo who lives in an apartment that does not require you to wear pants is clutch.
7. Your friends have 1) actually met him and 2) actually like him
It’s hard enough to coordinate schedules and find time to hang out with your friends; finding time when you can all hang out and bring bae is even harder. And if they actually approve? Winner winner chicken dinner.
8. You’ve talked about going halfsies on a streaming service
If they gave you their HBO GO password, hold onto them.
9. They have a summer house in the Hamptons
Show up with a case of rosé and pay for their lobster roll and you’re even.
10. They cook for you
I know very few New Yorkers who actually use their typically minuscule kitchens to cook real meals, so if you find someone who does, and they’re willing to share...lock that down. Or, if they have Seamless waiting for you when you arrive, that works too.