Carrie Bradshaw once said that New Yorkers are always either looking for a job, a boyfriend, or an apartment. And while her shoe collection is wildly out of line with the average salary of a newspaper columnist, this statement bears a great deal of truth.
We're always on the go, never fully committing to one thing. It's just in our nature.
But even though you know full well that your tiny Astoria apartment won't be home forever, there's still some important stuff you need to know about moving into a new place.
In an ideal world, your landlord is a sweet, old lady who reminds you of your grandma, bakes you fresh cookies, and always sends the plumber to fix your toilet when she says she will.
In reality, you probably will never even see your landlord. He/she will never return your emails and you will eventually convince yourself that this person doesn't actually exist and a robot has been cashing your rent checks every month.
But even though you know full well that your tiny Astoria apartment won't be home forever, there's still some important stuff you need to know about moving into a new place.
Maybe your landlord is someone terrifying and sadistic who's painted the walls black and is hell bent on never painting it themselves again. Of course, they probably never thought of letting you hit up Paintzen to let you learn how to paint the walls yourself. In that case, you gotta let 'em know.
Paintzen offers incredible DIY painting kits, including a selection of 3,500 premium Benjamin Moore shades, all of the paint and supplies that you need to complete the job.
Either way, there are a few crucial questions that you should run past them before settling in. Read on to find out what they are.
1. "Is that a cockroach?"
A dark, shiny thing scampers past your feet and disappears into a crack in the floorboard.
You jump and suddenly have a flashback to the time when a centipede took up residence in the bedroom of your old apartment, resulting in you sleeping on the couch for a week.
You can't go through that again.
2. "Can I paint?"
This question is hella important after catching a glance of the horrible mustard yellow paint that adorns an unfortunate number of rooms.
It is so close to the color of actual human earwax that you put a brief pause on your disgust in order to marvel at the accuracy.
This is over soon enough and you immediately place an order on Paintzen for your own DIY painting kit.
All you have to do is tell them your plans, select from over 3,500 Benjamin Moore colors and finishes, and they'll deliver you everything you need to get the job done.
And it doesn't have to be just regular paint either. Have you ever witnessed the real world miracle that is dry erase board walls in your apartment?! It's incredible.
If you're someone who would love the idea of drawing on your walls with markers, hit up Paintzen for dry-erase board paint!
They'll send you over the perfect amount of paint, supplies for prep, painting, and cleanup, as well as some video tutorials so you don't spend your days hating yourself for totally screwing it all up.
3. "What's that smell?"
A less than unpleasant stench wafts over you as you make your way up the stairs to the apartment. It doesn't seem to be getting any better as you reach the door and step in side. In fact, it seems to be getting worse.
You're immediately reminded of a friend of yours who signed a lease for a super cheap apartment, thinking he scored, only to realize that the apartment building was located near a sewage treatment plant.
Is THAT why the landlord is only charging you $650???
4. "Can I bring my dog?"
You wouldn't even dream of living in a place that doesn't allow you to bring along your beloved Italian greyhound, Ravioli.
And although you're slightly concerned about owning a dog in a fifth floor walk up, it's worth the sacrifice. You'd take a bullet for Ravi.
5. "Where's the nearest laundromat?"
Since your apartment obviously doesn't come with a washer-dryer, this is a crucial question.
Still, you daydream regularly about the day when you can do your laundry without ever leaving your home. Wouldn't that be something? For New Yorkers, this is akin to having your own parking space, or whatever normal, non-city dwellers get excited about.
But until then, you'll keep a jar of quarters in your room for your weekly schleps down the block to the laundromat.
6. "...Is this lead paint?"
The building looks like it hasn't seen a hint of an update since around 1974.
This, along with the paranoia instilled in you by your mother, leads you to believe that the crumbling paint on your future bedroom's walls is riddled with toxic lead.
No, you don't plan to be chewing on the walls of your new apartment, but hey, you never know. Better safe than sorry.
Your landlord assures you that the paint is lead-free, but his eyes dart around frantically as he nervously changes the subject, so you don't exactly trust this answer.
Of course, this is no problem, because Paintzen makes it super easy to DIY your place. It's fast, too - they can have supplies delivered to you within 24 hours.
7. "Is this place haunted?"
While on the surface this might seem like a ridiculous question, it's not something we're not going to NOT ask. If you're superstitious, you've probably already done the legwork and researched the hell out of any place you're about to move.
Get Started on Learning How to DIY Your Tiny NYC Apartment with Paintzen Right Here.